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Top 5 ways to start loving yourself the way you deserve to be loved

Loving ourselves is so critical to life. Yet, it is often either overdone or vilified. With all things, there's a balance. We're all very familiar with the damage caused by those who love themselves too much. Having a humble nature is valuable, but we can take it too far. We need to love ourselves in order to enjoy a healthy body, healthy relationships and an overall healthy life. If you've struggled like I have in the past, where do you start?

1 - Start with just one

Pick just one thing you can genuinely love about yourself. Really, just one. It could be a physical, intellectual or emotional characteristic or ability.

Enhance it. Draw attention to it. Make it the quality most people comment on first.

If you're having trouble, ask those you love to give you a list. I did this at the start of my journey. I picked my eyes. My makeup, clothes, body language all focused for years on drawing attention to my eyes instead of anything else. Eventually, I built more confidence little by little.

2 - Search for evidence

Scour emails, texts, letters, even cards from childhood. Look for evidence that you're a lovable person. What qualities do others admire in you? Make a list of everything, even the seemingly small stuff like, "Yeah, I had fun." Add "Fun" to your list.

Now, read through your list every morning. Pay attention throughout the day to evidence that what that person said was true. Do you live the exact same life every single day? Then don't expect to see all the words on your list every day. We're just compiling evidence that those things are still true about.

More than likely, you'll find yourself eventually creating opportunities that furnish proof of the things on your list. Don't worry! This is NOT cheating. This is exactly what you want to happen. You're training yourself to become who you dream of being.

3 - Know your limits

The word modest isn't a weak word. It comes from Latin, meaning "keeping due measure." So, let's measure you up to find out where you begin and end. In some regards, you can can bend or change your measurements. Still, it's important to know where you're starting and where your breaking point is.

Take some time to learn about where you are right now. Do you recharge by being around people or being alone? What's your communication style? What makes you feel loved, appreciated, agitated or hurt? Are you a morning person or a night owl? What kind of food, entertainment and association fuel you? If you're already familiar with this kind of information about yourself, great. Write it down. If not, take some online assessments, read some books or track your experiences to take your measurements.

Once you know your limitations, you can set yourself up for success by operating within those boundaries most of the time. This optimizes the energy you'll have for healing from the past and drawing out what new measurements you'd like to have.

4 - Nourish yourself

This isn't just about physical food, although that's a critical component. Once you've found out what fuels you, do it.

Make a plan and set up some accountability to hold yourself to it. Create weekly meal plans. Drink plenty of water, eat real food and pay attention to what you're putting in and on your body. Schedule regular time to exercise your body and your mind. Don't forget the spiritual things, these are most important.

Your body is your home, a gift, and the vehicle for both your experiences and your sacrifices. Your entire being needs to be nourished in order to make the most of your life. Choose to see that, not as a burdensome responsibility, but a beautiful expression of love. That makes it much easier, I promise.

5 - Use the Reset button

All too often in today's crazy world, we to just keep going. Guess what? We don't work that way. Life, our bodies, our minds all need down time. Peace and quiet. A time to reset. You come with a built in Reset button. So, use it.

Take the time you need to rest and regroup. A rest does not include social media. Sleep does not mean passing out on the couch. I recently heard Brendon Burchard talk about having a Transition Meditation, where he takes a few minutes to transition from work to being a husband at home. This is appropriate rest. It can be just 5 minutes of quiet thought. How do you want to show up for your next activity? Mentally plan out, not what you'll do, but how good you'll feel doing it.

I cannot stress enough the importance of good sleep. Not energy drinks to try and compensate, which is how far too many are trying to function. Have a regular bedtime and a bedtime routine. Yep, just like when you were a kid. (If you didn't have that as a kid, I'm deeply sorry. Please, show some love to yourself now and email me right now if you need help figuring out what to do. Seriously. I'll answer you myself.) Sleep is critically important! It's how our body processes one day and gets ready for the next. Make this a top priority.

There are so many other little ways to show love to yourself. Sometimes, it's hard to know exactly which choice shows the greatest amount of genuine love. These top 5 are a great place to start. IF you're ready to dig deeper and see how you can personally show more love in the way you live your life, click here schedule an appointment. Don't forget to follow us on Facebook and Instagram.

Thanks for showing love to yourself today and reading these top 5 ways to continue loving yourself as you deserve. Have a lovely day!


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